Teen Resources for Self Esteem

As I mentioned in an earlier post, the YA Literature class I'm enrolled in is built around the Search Institutes's Developmental Assets for Teens.  One of the assignments this semester was a group project where we interviewed teens and adults in the community about a particular asset.  My group focused on one of the internal assets for Positive Identity, Self Esteem.  We interviewed teens, teachers, librarians, a nurse, a personal trainer for teens and a teen counselor to find out what the trends were in building self esteem for teens.  We compiled a great annotated bibliography to help parents, adults and teens communicate about and  build self esteem.  Here is our comprehensive guide!

Adults

Books

 ''How Girls THRIVE'' by JoAnn Deak (2010)
This book answers questions parents have about how teen girls and their social setting. ''How Girls Thrive'' covers a range of topics from how to protect teens from cyber-bullying to suggestions of how parents and educators can work together to help their daughters develop a positive self-image.


 ''The Lolita Effect: Why the media sexualize young girls and what you can do about it'' by M. Gigi Durham (2008)
Girls' esteem is influenced not only by what people say to them in their day to day encounters, girls' esteem is also influenced by what they see in the media. This book draws examples from popular TV shows, magazines, movies, and Web sites to show how sexuality is defined in media (often in ways detrimental to girls' healthy development) as well as effective and progressive strategies to help encourage a positive self-image.

''That Crumpled Paper Was Due Last Week: Helping disorganized and distracted boys succeed in school and life'' by Ana Homayoun (2010)
Succeeding in school and getting assignments done on time all help build a child's self-confidence, but why do boys seem to struggle more than girls when it comes to organization and time management? This book addresses these issues and more; how parents themselves factor into the equation and what they can do to help get their sons organized, create a positive place to study, and how to help sons de-stress, recharge, and grow. There are chapters that focus on special considerations like learning differences, and struggling living with a single parent/guardian or in separation/divorce two parent household. Suggestions on how to implement these suggestions are also included.

 ''Packaging Boyhood: Saving our sons from superheroes, slackers, and other media stereotypes'' by Sharon Lamb, Lyn Mikel Brown, and Mark Tappan (2009)
Teenage sons can be confusing; it is sometimes hard to figure out what they are thinking and why they do the things they do. ''Packaging Boyhood'' breaks down boy's behavior by explaining the influence society has on developing boys. Topics in this book include how society influences what boys wear and why, what boys watch, and what boys read. There is also a section that addresses why boys’ rebel and suggestions on how to talk to your son is discussed.

 ''Success Express for Teens: 50 Life-Changing Activities'' by Roger Leslie (2004)
For parents looking for activities to do with teens and in groups, this book fits the bill. This book provides an assortment of activities that encourage teens to work with others. While some of the activities can be done alone, others are meant to be done with a group. Since working with peers in group settings is one of the best ways to build self-esteem, this book is a good tool to help encourage both outcomes.

 ''The Secret Lives of Boys: Inside the raw emotional world of male teens'' by Malina Saval (2009)
The inner workings of a teenage son is mysterious, but as a parent you want to understand him in order to provide him the best support possible. This book offers an examination of the secret world of boyhood; the cliques that are formed, the way boys see themselves in today's society in relation to growing up, and why boys are testing the limits of rebellion.

 ''Short: Walking tall when you're not tall at all'' by John Schwartz (2010)
In our society, being tall is an expectation that puts a lot of pressure on developing young adults. Those who are short, especially boys, are teased by others and may not feel as confident with their bodies; wishing they were taller so they could fit in better. By looking at the marketing, psychology, and mythology behind the obsession with height, Schwartz reveals being short does not have to be a disadvantage.

 ''Good Girls Don't Get Fat: How weight obsession is screwing up our girls and what we can do to help them thrive despite it'' by Robyn J.A. Silverman (2010)
This book draws on the authors' research at Tufts University and interviews with hundreds of young women to help girls realize that, no matter what their size, they can accomplish anything. By examining the fixation teenage girls have on their weight, discussing negative social and cultural influences, and providing suggestions, this book will gives advice to parents that will help them help their teenage daughters develop a healthy body-image and self-esteem.

''Talk with Teens About What Matters to Them: Ready-to-Use Discussions on Stress, Identity, Feelings, Relationships, Family, and the Future'' by Jean Sunde Peterson Ph.D.  (2011)
This book is an excellent resource that supports communication between adults and teens by providing example discussions.  This title helps adults broach difficult subjects in a way that teens will respond, and helps adults in our community implement their own guidelines of advice, including talking, listening, showing they care and offering help.


''Activities for Success - Facilitation Manual - Winning Futures'' by Winning Futures (2010)
This text is a resource for teachers, mentors and other adults to help teens think about the goals and interests they have for the future.  By engaging teens in activities, the results can help adults determine what teens are good at, allowing adults to define their interests and build their confidence by identifying their strengths.

Community Programs

Girls on the Run
Girls on the Run is a program for girls ages eight to thirteen. The program combines training for a capstone 3.1 mile run with uplifting workouts meant to promote good self-esteem. As their website says: "The goals of the programs are to encourage positive emotional, social, mental, spiritual and physical development." Although it is mainly for younger girls, it does include the tween population as well as those who are thirteen. The program takes place in cities throughout the United States. Adults can become involved as coaches, assistant coaches, or through financial support.

Teens in Training at the YMCA
Adults who want to learn more about supporting healthy lifestyles for teens can volunteer as a mentor at the local YMCA to give teens guidance and advice from an adult that can serve as a role model.  Other adults who have experience in exercise training, can become leaders of the Teens In Training sessions.  These instructors teach proper exercise techniques, help teens set goals for their health and provide positive reinforcement to build confidence.

Online Resources

About.com Teens
 How To Find a Tutor for Your Teen
This is a great article that helps parents aid teens who are struggling academically.  It gives great advice, like trying not to put more stress on teens and gives step by step instructions of what a parent can do like calling the school and seeking out guidance counselors. This resource also directs parents to sites that offer tutoring help (sometimes free) like the [http://www2.ed.gov/nclb/landing.jhtml No Child Left Behind Act], a government program that helps close achievement gaps.

DoSomething.org
Adults play a large role in developing a teen’s self-esteem, so they need to be aware of the issues. This site not only provides facts, about teens and self-esteem, it also gives suggestions on how to volunteer and help in the community. This site also provides information about other organizations you can get involved in.

Operation Beautiful
The mission of Operation Beautiful is to help end negative self-talk for people of all ages. Adults can get a lot of ideas by reading this blog. The founder of Operation Beautiful, Caitlin Boyle, maintains the website and also participates in many speaking engagements at schools and colleges throughout the country. It would be possible for a high school or library to have Caitlin come speak about increasing self-esteem and banishing negative self-talk.

ParentFurthur: A Search Institute Resource For Families
This site is a great resource for parents and other adults to find assistance in parenting different age groups, including teens.  The site assists in improving parenting skills through education and communication.  It provides insight into developmental stages of tweens and teens including areas of emotional, spiritual, intellectual, social and physical maturity.  This is a great site for adults to use in order to learn more about what teens are going through and how to discuss the topics in their lives.

Teens

Fiction

 ''Orange'' by Benjomin (2009)
This manga tells the story of a girl who feels “pathetic and alone”, has empty friendships, and has boyfriends who treat her poorly. After a meeting with a mysterious man, her outlook on life changes drastically. Anyone who has felt they were in a similar situation, this book will strike home, for it helps remind you that sometimes a simple meeting can change your life.

 ''Albatross'' by Josie Bloss (2010)
This book is about a girl who moves to a new town after her parents divorce. Tess’ feelings of being angry at her parents and feeling alone at her new school are fierce, “I was very tired. Tired of pretending like I was fine with it all, that I was okay with being here, that I wasn't worrying about Dad and what he was doing now that we were gone.” When Tess finally finds self-confidence, it again plummets as her obsession with Micah grows and as he wavers between being affectionate and abusive. Tess’ struggle to listen to the voice in her head that urges her not to be a victim, which teaches a valuable message: do not put up with men who make you feel bad about yourself.

 ''Fat Cat'' by Robin Brande (2009)
In ''Fat Cat'', the protagonist, Cat is a fat, brainiac, who decides to conduct a new type of science fair project: to live a prehistoric lifestyle for seven months. Cat gives up cars, phones, TVs, computers, and even processed foods in her determination to win the science fair’s competition. When Cat’s new slim body begins to attract boys’ attention, Cat realizes her project can be expanded to observe the effects on herself on others. Teen girls will see being loving yourself is the key to happiness, being smart is sexy and that a strong relationship with friends is important.

 ''Plastic'' by Sarah N. Harvey (2010)
''Plastic'' is written from the point of view of a high school boy, who has decided to embark on a quest to stop his best friend from getting breast implants. Jack's adventure is sometimes funny (he learns more about breasts than he ever thought possible), but also informative, as Jack explores the pros and cons of plastic surgery. This book not only focuses on girls and how they feel inadequate in their bodies, this book also explores body image from a male’s perspective.

 ''Blue Plate Special'' by Michelle D. Kwasney (2009)
This book's setting shifts across three decades; telling the story of three very different girls all being raised by single mothers in New York City. All girls have self-esteem issues: one is struggling with poor body image and caring for an alcoholic mother, another was raped and is now pregnant, and the last is in a relationship that is holding her back, but she is afraid to leave. As the story progresses, all three characters strive to rise above their "less-than-perfect" lives by attempting to build better lives. Through the trials and tribulations of the characters, this book shows readers life is not perfect, but you can do something and things will get better.


 ''SMILE'' by Raina Telgemeier (2010)
A funny autobiography in graphic novel format describes how the author lost two of her front teeth in an accident when she was twelve, and her subsequent struggles with various corrective dental techniques throughout adolescence. A book sure to make you smile, but also realize no matter what happens in life, you can bounce back and will be stronger for it.

 ''When the Black Girl Sings'' by Bil Wright (2008)
For Lahni, growing up has never been easy. Being an African American adopted by white parents who goes to an all-white school, Lahani feels like she sticks out in all the wrong ways. When her adoptive parents decide to separate, Lahni feels her life is falling apart. Lahni learns to find solace signing in a church choir, which gives her confidence to compete in her school’s vocal competition. This book demonstrates the importance of group activities, how working with others and having support from your community is a great way to become confident, and overall how satisfying life is when you learn to love yourself.

Non-fiction

 ''Operation Beautiful: Transforming the Way You See Yourself One Post-it Note at a Time'' by Caitlin Boyle
Operation Beautiful is the companion book to the Operation Beautiful website. It features stories and post-it notes from her blog as well as those that were contributed during the writing process. The book is divided into 7 sections including Fat Talk, Family and Friends, Fitness, Food, and Faith. She also has a book coming out this summer that focuses more on younger girls.


 ''The 6 Most Important Decisions You'll Ever Make: A Guide for Teens'' by Sean Covey (2006)
This book is broken into six parts: each one focusing on a specific key decision one needs to make in order to have a productive future. The decisions involve: getting a good education, choosing true friends, getting along with parents, dating and sex, avoiding addictions, and establishing a healthy sense of self-worth. Covey provides realistic tips for how to make a decision and how to follow through with the decision you have made. A plus to this book is that in addition to text, there are funny graphics, cartoons and movie quotes.

 ''Think Confident, Be Confident for Teens: A cognitive therapy guide to overcoming self-doubt and creating unshakable self-esteem'' by Marci G. Fox and Leslie Sokol (2011) 
This book contains real-life teen stories about the tough stuff questions you have: from friends and romance to family relationships. This book also addresses reasons you might be feeling out of sorts as well as ways to help turn your confidence around.

 ''Be Beautiful: Every Girl's Guide to Hair, Skin and Make-up'' by Alice Hart-Davis & Molly Hindhaugh.  (2009)
Appearance is a very important aspect of teen confidence and self esteem.  This guide for girls is a "beauty bible" filled with tips for looking one's best.

 ''So You Want to be a Veterinarian'' by Robert F. Kahrs (2009)
Since veterinarian medicine seems to be a popular goal for many teens, we recommend checking out this book.  This title gives aspiring veterinarians the details of college requirements for admission in veterinary medicine schools, curriculum information, specialty areas in the field and more.


 ''So You Want To Be A Teacher?'' by Janice Koch (2009)
Education is a prominent future career choice for teens.  This book helps students determine if this field is a good fit for them by asking questions to analyze why they want to teach, who they are and whether their answers can determine if they'd be a good teacher.

 ''A girl's guide to life: The real deal on growing up, being true, and making your teen years fabulous!'' Katie Meier (2010)
Answers to everything from health and beauty, to how to improve your body, mind, and soul, to helping you decode what really is up with guys are covered in this book.

 ''Teen Esteem: A Self-Direction Manual for Young Adults'' by Pat Palmer and Melissa Alberti Froehner (2010)
This book is great for teens to look through to get ideas on how to build their esteem. Even teens who feel confident about themselves can learn a tip of two from this book, for the

 ''You Grow Girl! A Self-empowering Workbook for Tweens and Teens'' by Gina Scarano-Osika and Kim Dever-Johnson (2008) 
You Grow Girl! is a workbook for girls 9-16 to deal with issues they struggle with every day. As the description says, "It helps them see and utilize the connection between their self esteem, thought patterns, eating habits, and overall health-to establish a balanced, integrated perspective that fosters good habits to serve for a lifetime. Interactive sections on weight/size/food issues, coping with stress, culture and peer pressures, deceptive media/Internet images, exercise, and mindfulness."


 ''PostSecret: Extraordinary Confessions from Ordinary Lives'' by Frank Warren (2005) 
In this book, people from across the country artistically reveal their deepest darkest secrets: be they of regret, fear, betrayal, desire or a simple confession. The collage-style postcard format makes this a fun book to browse through. Every secret you have and never wanted anyone to hear will seem trivial after looking through this collection of other people's real secrets.

Magazines

 ''Girls Life'' 
This magazine provides fun information, but without all the celebrity obsession. Yes, the magazine does have an entertainment section, but the rest of the magazine focuses on the issues real girls want answers to. The fashion section gives information on in style clothes to purchase that fit every budge. Other sections provide readers with tips about boys and dating, information about tough stuff, health and body image, and quizzes, horoscopes, most embarrassing moments, and other “fun stuff”.


 ''Teen Ink'' 
This magazine is created solely by teens ages 13-19. Topics in this magazine include writing, art, photos and forums. This is an interesting magazine that lets you enjoy what other teens have been creating and also provides you with a place where you can get your own pieces published.


''Teen Voices''
This is a good magazine for young women who want to read something besides the standard fashion magazines. This magazine covers real issues: like date rape, teen pregnancy, suicide, family issues, and body image issues.

Websites

To Write Love on Her Arms
To Write Love on Her Arms is a non-profit movement dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury and suicide.  TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire and also to invest directly into treatment and recovery.” This site has a blog, facts, ways to find help, a calendar of events, and topics in the news. Teens can use this site to find group activities, which is a great way to build self-esteem. This site also helps those with a poor image realize they are not alone in their struggles.


Teens Health
This site provides teens with a variety of information about taking care of themselves and living a healthy lifestyle. From tips on how to get rid of acne, to a guy’s guide on body image, to answering questions about sexual health and drugs and alcohol this site answers many questions teens have about their developing body that they may be too embarrassed to talk to their parents about. This site even has a section about food, exercise and recipes, so teens can learn to take control of living a healthy, independent lifestyle.

Girls Health
This website is geared toward girls 10-16. It was created by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. As their site says, "Girlshealth.gov promotes healthy and positive behaviors in girls, giving them reliable and useful health information in a fun, easy-to-understand way."


Adios, Barbie: The One Stop Body Image Shop for Identity Issues including Race, Size, Media, and More!

According to their website, "At AdiosBarbie.com, we create articles, campaigns, events and other cool stuff that inspires a body and self-loving world." The website has posts, positive articles, lists of resources, and video resources that promote having a positive self-image.

About.com Teen Advice
How To Talk To Your Parents

This a quick how-to guide on having a positive discussion with a parent, whether it's to talk about something minor or something that's a big deal.  The article gives tips on broaching a subject and  remaining calm and patient in order to have a successful conversation.  Teens who find it difficult to talk to parents and other adults will find the tips in this article helpful in opening the door to communication.

Multimedia

 
 ''America the Beautiful'' directed by Darryl Roberts (2010)
This informative film discusses America’s fixation with physical perfection. An eyeopener that not only makes people realize how artificial Hollywood is, it also shows viewers how distorted the image of beauty is. Viewers are reminded that what they see in the media is not real, and that real beauty is being exactly who you are.

Blogs

Empowered Teens and Parents
Debra Beck’s blog is aimed at teen girls and adults. This blog gives many ideas on how adults and teens can work together.


Operation Beautiful
The Operation Beautiful website is there to promote the end of negative self-talk. People write uplifting post-it notes and leave them in public places so that others will receive a positive message. Teens can add to the website by emailing the founder, Caitlin Boyle, photos of the post-it notes they put in public places. Teens from around the world have submitted photos and stories, so even visiting the site can have a positive impact on the self-esteem of a teenager.


Push To Talk:A Blog For Teens

This blog is powered by teens at the Seattle Public Library.  While it is not based in our small community, the blog is written by and for teens on subjects that affect teens everywhere! Topics include using electronic resources for homework assignments, bullying, books and even has an "Ask Me" column written by a teen who answers questions and gives insight into problems teens may have at school, with friends, family and relationships.

Community Programs

Girls on the Run
Girls on the Run is a program for girls who are eight to thirteen years old. The program combines training for a capstone 3.1 mile run with uplifting workouts meant to promote positive self-esteem. As their website says: "The goals of the programs are to encourage positive emotional, social, mental, spiritual and physical development." This is a great program for tweens and teens to get involved with because it helps develop a positive self-image as well as show them they have the ability to work hard and run a 5K at the end of the program.

Teens In Training at the YMCA
Teens who want to learn proper exercise techniques, become healthier, or just interact with other teens who want to be active can enroll in the Teens In Training Program.  This program is fun, helps meet fitness goals, and zeroes in on strengths so that teens can even teach other students! It's also a great way to meet other teens who have similar interests and goals.

I have to send a shout out to my partners in this assignment for all their help! Thanks Amy and Kaithlin!